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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
While I was driving down the road the other day, (going a little faster than I should have been) I passed over a bridge only to see a copper on the other side with a radar gun laying in wait.

The copper pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know about, asked "What's your hurry?"

To which I replied, "I'm late for work."

To which he asked, "What do you do?"

"I'm a rectum stretcher," was my response.

The copper was surprised and confused. "A what? A rectum stretcher?? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?" "Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch the hole, until it's about 6 feet." Then the copper asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six-foot arsehole?" To which I politely replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..."

Speeding ticket: £95.00

Court costs: £65

Look on copper's face ... Priceless

Penny :D
 

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ahahha you ppl are mad !!

Cop pulled me over town down once because he heard me 4 blocks away with my exhaust and me gunning it ever stop light… He came up to the window and was like what are you doing I heard you 4 blocks away..
I told him I was a retard… The shock his head and said yeah you are. Then walked to his car and drove away..

Talk about a power trip they just like to know they are above the law.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
MadBrad said:
heard it, it's a real good one. Are court costs that high in England? Here it's $3.75 and a $25 victim surcharge.
Brad

I got caught by a mobile speed camera recently doing 40mph in a 30 and got a fixed penalty ticket - £60.00 fine plus 3 points on my licence. The fine and number of points increases accordingly to the speed. 12 points and it's an automatic ban. (Only 6 points allowed if the driver has not held a full licence for two years or more).

Penny :(
 

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60 pounds for 10 miles is alot steeper than we get hit here.
here 16 km would net them $42(16X3)+3.75(court cost)+$25(victim surcharge)=$60.75Canadian money which is like 2 British pounds(kidding)
but...
20 km and above it's 4$per km
30km and above it's 5$ per km
40km and above it's $6 per km
that's not your speed that's how much over the limit.
I might have those nuber wrong but it's something like that.
 

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Here it's like... Well I don't know, it depends on the speed limit, really. Twice the speed limit will (well, it's supposed to, they didn't do it to me) get you arrested. 20 MPH over in a 45, I know, is about a 300 (american) dollar fine. Plus court costs which usually run about 50. But I'm slick, the cops don't catch me. :wink:
 

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Here in California I got pulled over in my moms Camry on the Freeway, I was doing "85" and the rest of the freeway was doing more, but the cop must have liked me more. So I get pulled over, cop just had an estimated speed cause he was passing me and decided I was going too fast, and my fine was only $218. Stupid though considering we were both passed not three seconds earlier by a WRX... whatever.
 
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