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Discussion Starter #1
Ok first of all you know how I find dildos funny. If you think they are funny and you can read shitty English at its best you should probably continue reading this post.

Here is what happened to me last night when I was drunk and found a dildo at one of my girlfriend's friend's house. It was still in the box and has supposedly "never" been used. So anyway I took it and put it in my girlfriend's purse and we went to a club in Ottawa called "Le pub en ville" maybe dreamland knows about this bar.

So here I am all drunk and bored celebrating my "21st birthday" with nothing to do when I get the idea of playing with the dildo in the bar. So I unzip my pants and put the dildo in my zipper with the thing hanging out. But what the fuck no one was noticing that I had a 7 inch dildo hanging out of my pants. I even went teaching some girls how to play pool with the dildo hanging out. No one noticed it I even rub it on some chick's ass while passing next to her... So I sat on the big chair with my hands behind my back and just chilled on the seat and looked at others reaction. People didn't want to see it and if they did they didn't even double check to see.

Anyway, here is what I did next. I thought if I would walk to a girl and say: "Sorry I just saw this dildo fall out of your purse". So here I am walking in the bar asking chicks. "Sorry but this dildo just fell out of your purse."

Here are the replies I got.

- Some just started laughing and said it wasn´t theirs.

- One girl that we called "the bitch" was looking everywhere and showing signs of embarrassment while I was telling her the dildo was hers and telling me to get lost while her 2 boyfriends where getting ready to kick my ass. She even took all her rage on the dildo and sucker punched him on the floor.

But most of them just told me: "it´s not mine" and I would walk away saying: "well thanks I'll keep it then."

I was really surprised how people didn't laugh but maybe I should have told them all this was a joke.

Anyway, just thought I would try to make you guys laugh with the stupid shit I do when I'm drunk.

Have a nice day and don't bother writting back that I'm an immature asshole.
:-]

[ This message was edited by: FourDiceS04 on 18-04-2003 16:41 ]
 

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Maybe if your name was Jonny Knoxville, or Steve-O you would have got more laughs. I´m quite surprised myself. Thats good quality dildo humor there. Maybe you should have said to "the Bitch" after she was all snnoty, "Wait, this can´t be yours. I see yours is still shooved up your ass. Nevermind."
 

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Hi Four-Dice. I would have laughed. I would have denied knowing you and I´m glad I was probably at another pub that night but I would have laughed!

(BTW, I´m no cultural expert but I think you have a distinctly Quebecois sense of humour. Our US friends may not get it but, of all places, Ottawa needs it. You´re a lunatic!)

lol
- Rob
 

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Even as a person from the US, I think that´s fuxxing hilarious....Reminds of the pointless things that me and my friends do. ;-)
 

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Discussion Starter #9
Dawn, just read this thread again. When im drunk I do the dumbest stuff...


*FourDiceS04 brings the dildo joke back to life*
 

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you should have asked one of your friend to get something from your friend's purse :)
hahahaha would have been funny too to see his reaction ahahah :)
 

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i'm sure this would qualify as sexual harrassment, but since the ladies seemed to be ok with what you did, this should have been fine. you COULD have taken it a step further and asked them to demonstrate what one would do with the dildo, and acted like a complete moron. or, you could have also kept it, and "pretended" to find it in one of your buddy's gloveboxes the next day. also, you could have gone up to the bar tender (i'm assuming there was a bar???) and said you found it in your drink. i don't know, just some ideas. by the way, i'm from the US, and i'm turning 18 on the 28th of this month. so, experience with bars i have not. but i'll be able to go clubbin pretty soon haha
 

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all you boys and the excitement over dildos.... its hilarious... i dont know why anyone would be all embarassed over toys...LoL :wink:

Laci
 

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Discussion Starter #13
Wow i just found a site who nicknames dildos and calls them Dills... Just like a old pal... If i'd be a girl I wouldn't know wich dildo to take.

Realistic Silicone Dills


Semi-Realistic Silicone Dills


Non-Realistic Silicone Dills


Double-Ended Dills


And the best one, the new traveller's dildo.. Pack'n'Play


If you notice the difference between the realistic and semi-realistic dildo is the realistic one comes with a set of nuts! wow, lucky girl
 

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RoLLiNnCaLi said:
all you boys and the excitement over dildos.... its hilarious... i dont know why anyone would be all embarassed over toys...LoL :wink:

Laci
:D Couldn't agree more, after all, they're cheap, do as they're told, don't have headaches or get drunk and best of all, you don't have to wash their underwear or iron their shirts!!! If someone had offered it to me, I would have seized the moment!!!*** :angel12:

Penny :wink:
 
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